THE KING AND THE DOCTORS BY GEORGE BERNARD SHAW

G.B. Shaw satirizes the doctor profession in The King and the Doctors. It criticizes the doctors’ professional rivalry. 

Once upon a time, In the country of the Half Mad the King fell ill. As he was very kind to his people, his illness made the people very sad. There were about twelve doctors to treat him. However, there was no sign of his being cured. People became anxious. They said a single doctor was generally sufficient to kill one of them, so how the king could survive twelve doctors.

The Prince asked the chief physician whether it was not possible to cure the King. The physician replied that everything was being done that could properly done. The physician asked if he had no confidence in their knowledge and devotion. The prince said that their devotion was all right but their knowledge was bunk. He requested the Prince to suggest any measure they had omitted.

They discussed on giving drugs. The Prince questioned whether drugs were bunk or not. The physician said that undoubtedly drugs are bunk. The Prince said that there was a way of giving drugs in infinitesimal quantities. The physician replied that infinitesimals were used only by homeopaths. He said that Homeopaths did not know the nature of disease. 

The Prince asked physician whether he knew the nature of the disease. The physician replied that he had passed an examination in pathology and written books about it.  The prince asked what his father’s complaint was. The physician replied that if he had known that he could have cured it. The Prince said that then pathology was bunk.

The prince requested the physician to call in a homeopath. The physician replied that if he had discussed the case with the homeopath he would be excommunicated. The prince asked if his father’s spinal cord was fine. The prince asked him if he had heard of the galvanometer. The physician said that he had never heard of it. He assured that the ignorant Americans might use it. The prince requested him to call in the American. The chief doctor refused, saying he would be excommunicated.  

Then the Prince asked about testing his father’s blood for radiations. The physician said that it was discovered by an American. He was not only American but a Jew. But the Prince persisted that he understood he was a proper doctor.  

The Prince asked whether the patients recovered under the logical appropriate treatments. The physician said that some were cured and others were cured by the recuperative power of the human organism. 

The Prince requested the doctor to use the most up-to-date scientific treatment. The physician happily said he had already ordered it. The Prince eagerly asked what the treatment was. The physician said that was seaside. The physician whispered that it would get his father away from doctors. Shortly afterward, the King recovered.